Proper Etiquette Before & During Your Wedding

Despite popular belief, planning a wedding is not like buying a car or purchasing a home. The price that the vendor has to offer is not up for “negotiation”. When you go to order your wedding cake there isn’t an “asking price” and then the “bottom dollar”. The price is what it is and it is that way for a reason. This is their business – not just some hobby they like to do on the weekends. To be perfectly honest, it is quite insulting to try to negotiate with the vendor on their prices. This will only lead to a strained relationship if you do choose to go with them to provide their services – that is even if they will take you as a client. After behaving in such a manner there are quite a few vendors that will opt out of that situation completely.

It is also completely inappropriate to complain about a vendor’s prices in front of them. If a vendors prices are out of your budget you basically have three options; you can thank the person for their time and go find someone who can stay within your budget, you can possibly reduce the service that you are requesting so that it will fit within your budget, or you can re-work your budget to allow more to be allocated towards that particular service. If your budget is too low for their services, it is not the time to start haggling with them. Trying to bulldoze your way through the situation to get what you want is never a good option. It is also considered rude to ask to receive things for “free” that would normally have a fee attached to it.

Another piece of advice, take care of the people taking care of you. Sometimes this can be as simple as making sure your caterer provides your vendors with a meal the day of your wedding. If you photographer arrives at the same time you do, shoots photos the entire time you are getting ready, continues to work during the ceremony non-stop, and then keeps working right into the reception when do you think they will have time to break away and find something to eat? You would be awfully upset if they ran to get take-out during your “first dance”. The same thing goes for your wedding coordinator. These people are killing themselves in order to provide you with the day that you have always dreamed about. Keep that in mind when you are haggling over whether or not a meal should be provided to them or not. In the scope of things, it seems like a small price to pay.

Finally, be polite. It is never okay to yell at anyone despite what a television show might let on. Yelling at a vendor, your bridesmaids, or anyone else for that matter is completely unacceptable. It goes back to the old adage “treat others how you want to be treated.” You would never stand for your wedding dress seamstress who started yelling at you because you didn’t “tone up” enough before the big day – so why would you yell at anyone else? A wedding is a stressful event and everyone involved feels that stress to some degree. Treating them poorly isn’t going to make the situation any better; in fact, it is only going to make it worse. How motivated are people going to be to go the extra mile for you if you have not treated them with respect?